I was realizing today that it’s not jealously that I feel about Taylor’s talent. It’s envy. That’s what I want to edit.
My writing went fairly well yesterday. It’s not quite the same story that I originally wrote but it’s mostly there. A few new details emerged as I was writing so it was fun to discover those. So far it has the feeling of optimism but I am feeling something dark under the surface and I can’t wait for it to reveal itself.
Something else I was thinking about today is I’ve been starting to notice that a lot of questions that I ask have unnecessary add on questions. Such as: Do you want to go to the store with me or would you rather stay home? There’s no need to ask the second question as it will be answered by the first one. I’ve been trying to catch myself doing it and edit myself before the 2nd question comes out. I find that I even do it in work emails but it’s a lot easier to catch myself typing out an unnecessary question when I see myself writing it than it is to catch myself when I’m talking. Sometimes the questions can get a little more complicated especially at work and can sometimes slip past me. Like when asking for instruction on how to proceed on a task. I could ask: Do you want me to send that excel sheet to the boss or would you like to look it over before I send it? Again, the 2nd question will be answered by the first one and so there is no need to ask it. I find that I am spending a whole lot less time on emails now that I am editing out questions that don’t need to be asked.
Well I’ve got a story waiting on me to put words to so that’s all for now.
I ask the two questions all the time. In my personal life, and this is just for me, l ask two questions because there is one outcome that l want. That question, whether it is first or second, l ask in a different tone or even volume. Unfounded insecurity is probably the cause of this to me.